Sometimes I look at my boys and wonder how I ever got so blessed to have two such fantastic creatures in my life. I have good boys. Big Brother has this wonderful gift of laughter that is so infectious and when he smiles the world smiles. Little Man has an extraordinarily advanced sense of humor that causes fits of giggles from all of us at the most inappropriate times, like in the middle of church. When I relax and just enjoy being around them? I feel blessed and happy. I see them for who they really are. I love them deeply. When I am in that relaxed place I forget the messes they made with the paint on the table and the fact that they still have not done the 3 tasks that I've asked them to do 6 times today. I forget the arguing and the talking back. And I forget that I am trying too hard to make them fit into my idea of who I think they should be. Just for a moment, I let them be who they are. When I let them be who they are I can be who I want to be...the sane, happy and well-adjusted mother I want so badly for them to have. It's not who they have most days right now. And I am sad for them. My lack of happiness is not their fault. It's just life and my lack of coping skills. They are good boys. They deserve better. And I am blessed to have them in my life.
3 Comments:
Wonderful post! Your boys are lucky to have you as their mom :) Even if you do post hilarious pictures of them! LOL
I think God sends us amazing kids to be our saving grace when we need it. I know mine have kept me hanging on many a time.
Sweetness, you aren't alone in your feelings. I really believe that most moms have moments like this and often. Hang in there. I'm sure that they know you're the best mom they could ever have. There's no perfect mom out there, but obviously your kiddos have what they need - a mom who loves them deeply and wants the best for her babes! What a precious post!
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