Deep Thoughts by Blogthings

IMPORTANT: Read this post preface:I don't want anyone to feel like they have to comment after reading my less than confident posts to reassure me that I am great and that I measure up. I appreciate those who truly desire to offer a kind word, cause it seriously does help. But if my whining bugs you, just know I understand. I'm still gonna write what I write though, because it's how I process my life struggles. We all struggle with life. Some of us do it better than others. I'm not a quiet struggler. I like to talk while I struggle and live. Hence, the blog. So just know that I know that I don't always put the most positive image of myself out there and I am not sharing so that I can get 10 people to tell me how great I am. I am sharing because 1) I need to write and 2) I hope it helps someone else feel a little less weird or alone to see that others struggle too. Life is what it is and I writes it as I lives and sees it. Okay? Moving on...

Who Am I?

It is a question I have been asking myself for a few months now. I think I am in the middle of a mid-life crisis. Strike that - I KNOW I am in the middle of a mid-life crisis. So I have been asking a lot of questions. The 20 year post thing I just did brought to mind some things I need to address, reminded me of where I've been and got me thinking even more about where I want to go. But it still doesn't answer the nagging question, "Who Am I?"

Just to clarify, the question is not as in "How did I get on earth, why am I here?" I have a pretty good handle on that. More like "How do I become the person I want to be?" kind of thing.

So I've spent the last few months (realistically, more like the last year, but it's really come to a head this last few months) pondering, looking, worrying, being depressed, struggling, searching for an answer. Then I find this: What Kind of Coffee Girl Are You?

You Are a Plain Ole Cup of Joe

But don't think plain - instead think, uncomplicated You're a low maintenance kind of girl... who can hang with the guys Down to earth, easy going, and fun! Yup, that's you: the friend everyone invites. And your dependable too. Both for a laugh and a sympathetic ear.

I can't help but think that I could have saved myself a lot of grief if I would've found this coffee girl quiz 6 months ago. Wow! This internet thing really is miraculous! All the answers to life's deepest questions right at your fingertips...Yeah, right!

Seriously though, this is a pretty accurate description of who I used to be. I asked my husband what he thought of this description. He said it was "very accurate awhile back, before you got all depressed and hormonal." Nice. He doesn't beat around the bush. But it's true. And really - it's who I want to be again, with the dependable part really worked out.