Monday, September 1, 2008

This is What I Heard ALL DAY TODAY!!!

I kept track...these are the actual words I heard from my children throughout the day. Obviously I need to have another training session about how we need to treat each other. Either that or I need a week away from home, BY MYSELF!!!

  • You like baby shows.
  • So you like idiot shows.
  • Change the channel, I am NOT watching this again!
  • Quit chewing with your mouth open.
  • Shut up!
  • We don't say that in this house, REMEMBER? (At least someone remembers!)
  • Leave me Alone!
  • Quit Touching Me!
  • Get your feet out of my face.
  • I'm going to kill you if you do that again.
  • I'm telling!
  • Get out!
  • You are such a jerk!
  • Who peed on the toilet? You're s'posed to wipe it off. Come wipe it off!
  • That was my glass! You drank out of my glass!
  • Gross! You just spit on me!
  • I am sick of watching your show. It's always YOUR show!
  • I asked first! I asked first!
  • It's my turn now, you've been playing forever.
  • You always cheat.
  • Quit farting, it stinks in here.
  • I don't care what you want to do, this is MY game!
  • You ALWAYS cheat!
  • I'm telling mom that you are being a jerk.
  • Give me back my stuff. I said give it back!
  • You are such a moron!
  • I don't wanna play with you.
  • You never let me play the game I wanna play.
  • That's cause your games are stupid.
  • No they aren't.
  • Yes they are.
  • OWWWWW! Why did you hit me?
  • Cause you said my games are stupid. Why are you so mean to me?
  • Why do you keep hitting me?
  • Stop it!
  • If you hit me one more time I will hit you back.
  • I'm gonna throw the cat on you and make him scratch your face.
  • What's your problem?
  • You're a weiner head,
  • No, you are.
  • No, you are.
  • AAUUGGHH!! Quit calling me that!
  • Little man keeps beating the crud out of me.
  • No I'm not. I'm hitting him because he's making me mad.
  • Big Brother will not shut his mouth. He just keeps going Blah blah blah blah. He just keeps talking! It's making me so mad!
  • He ate my cookie! That was MY cookie!
  • You smell like a butt.
  • How do you know what butts smell like?
    (Hysterical laughter - Finally some laughing from both of them!)
  • Can we sleep in your bed?
  • That's my pillow, yours is the stinky one cause your head sweats.
  • Gimme that blanket. Gimme the blanket! I said give it to me! Fine, I'll rip your lion's tail off then.
  • MOM!!

    That's my cue, folks. Wish me luck. This could get ugly.


Kristi said...

I can NOT stop laughing!!! There are some seriously funny statements in there. Brings back memories with all my siblings. Man...the one "You smell like a butt" is hilarious. I know it gets old hearing all of that all day, but thanks for sharing it with us. It was a great laugh for me since I am not dealing with it.

4funboys said...

how in the world did you keep track of all that???

I try and tune it all out... but the volume keeps me crazy.

I am Boymom said...

Kristi and 4fun - I worked hard cleaning my house all week and while I was cleaning the kitchen, something just said, "this isn't my problem today, let it be their problem." So I just listened while I did dishes and while I wiped counters and while I sorted through a mile high stack of crap. It was really nice when I didn't take on their problem! Normally I would have been right in the middle, trying to fix it all because the noise drives me nuts and I can't stand the bickering! The gods were with me today, cause I was able to let it all roll off my back and just listen. The butt comment had me rolling! And in the end, I had a good day. Don't know about them, but that wasn't my problem today.

randa_joy said...

So funny: "I'm gonna throw the cat on you and make him scratch your face."
I can't wait.... (yeah right)

lailani said...

I just came by your site from CDW - I too am a boy mom - wouldn't trade it for anything! Even with the long list of quibbles and strange odors in the air that is quite humorous to one!

Anyway I am enjoying reading your blog . . and I agree with your friday blog, a write in is a consideration.

Good Day!

Gettysburg Mom said...

At least one of them knows that you're supposed to wipe the seat! :)

Thanks for the laugh!

HeatherPride said...

Oh, my...this is what I have to look forward to a few years from now!! Maybe I should invest in ear plugs!

Choppzs said...

Wow, that sounds allot like my house this summer! lol especially the name calling! lol

Birdie said...

I'm pretty sure you were at MY house when you heard all those things....*L* I'll have to make sure I show Bubby & Sis this post so they can see that they aren't the only ones that irritate each other. I was crackin' up at the baby show thing. That's such a deal here between them. That & him muting the girl commercials because they're "stupid". Funny post, MM!

Queen of Chaos said...

I'm just glad it's not just MY kids! haha

johnsonteammom said...

I thought maybe you had a tape recorder at my house and you were taping me!! JK Just consider having 7 of them! I could laugh all day

Rachael said...

This is soooo funny. I have tears running down my face. I grew up as an only child and have one daughter, so I don't have the pleasure of hearing these things. You may actually have the better end of the deal, since my daughter has no one to fight or argue with, I hear all the whining and fits all day, which are not usually all that funny.

Elaine A. said...

So this is my future, right? (I have 2 boys myself) Although I have 3 older brothers so this already sounds quite familiar!

Found you over at Three Boys One Mommy & so glad I stopped by! : )

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